GUAT'S UP?

GUATEMALA! Are you ready to rock?

(NK) We crossed the border into Guatemala and back into Latin Central America. Back to Spanish, pointless paperwork and questionable fees for everything. As we crossed the bridge we were stopped by a uniformed woman who wanted 40 Q for what, we weren’t exactly sure. We had been warned in Belize this might happen. After for a good 5 mins of arguing we decided that she could have the 40 Quetzales, or £3. Sometimes it’s not worth debating on the roadside over a few quid.

We drove on to El Remate, a village close to Tikal national park, which turned out to be full of hippies. Not the peace and love hippies of the 60s and 70s but an altogether more irritating breed of hippy that we’ve encountered more than once. Fortunately there was no cash machine in the town and we were out, so we headed to nearby Flores and liked it so much we decided to stay.

Flores

The view across lake Peten

An island on Lake Peten, Flores is joined to Santa Elena by a small causeway and has a very European feel. As we winded our way around the cobbled streets we saw some travel friends from Mexico, that we’d also bumped into in Belize and got straight onto one of the piers for some cold beer.

Harry's Lilo makes her an easy spot in Central America

We're still not sick of sunsets

We had a relaxing couple of days, swimming in the lake and getting our bearings but left for Tikal before getting too comfortable. It was the last Mayan ruin on our list and we had high hopes. Well known for being the grand daddy of all Mayan ruins it is still largely undiscovered and makes an appearance in Star Wars IV.

Driving into the park felt like taking a jaunt into Jurassic Park. Thick jungle surrounded us and the road warning signs certainly weren’t for deer.

Watch out for Jaguars!

And massive snakes!

We arrived at 3pm as it means your ticket is valid for the next day, allowing you to witness sunrise and sunset at the park. Luckily the campgrounds had some concrete floor palapas as the ground was rather moist.  Tikal it turns out is huge!

Campsite at Tikal

The jungle trees were very Avatar

Spread over an area of 16 sq km (mapped) 575 sq km (unmapped) it was home to an estimated 200,000 people. The race was on to make it to temple IV before the sun started to sink. After a sweaty trek through the jungle paths we were rewarded with a staggering view above the tree canopy and a huge double rainbow.

(FK) – We’d packed all the essentials in our bag – bug spray, umbrella, water, guide book, but forgot one of the most important items for the night time trek back to the tent – head torches. So, we found ourselves in the middle of the jungle, not really sure which way was the way out with crazy massive pyramids surrounding us. Hand in hand we managed to find our way to the campsite only to be greeted by 50 plus screaming scouts/girl guides who had clearly had too much sugar and were hyped about camping (who could blame them really).

We got tucked up in bed with our ear plugs to get up for our early rise and shine at 5.30am to see the sunrise over to Tikal. I am not a morning person but was pretty excited to see some wildlife on our way to Temple V. As we walked into the Park again, the scariest sounds were coming from the jungle, Jurassic Park eat your heart out. I thought one of the hotels was playing a mood setting soundtrack at first. It was actually the sound of Howler Monkeys.

We reached the temple in good time only to find the wooden ladder to climb it had been cut off at the bottom. Obviously the vertigo inducing climb had been deemed unsafe.

Let's give it a miss?

Oh well, never mind I thought. Neil’s response was to start scrambling his way up like a monkey. Urm, I’ll watch and you take the camera to show me what the view looks like! This is the view and this is how high it was.

Misty jungle morning

If I jump will you catch me Fi?

(NK) Sometimes I do love the lack of health and safety in Central America. Fairplay, they’d chopped the bottom of the ladder off as precaution, but there was no one to stop me playing Indiana Jones.

(FK) Pretty awesome ruins and beautiful setting, but that’s us done with those for a while. It’s driving me round the bend, thinking about how they managed to build them with such mathematical and astronomical precision.

The ruins at Tikal were spectacular

The journey to our next destination – Semuc Champey - took us through some jaw dropping scenery and along a road that reminded me of the death roads you see on channel 5. More than once I shrieked as my side went a little too close to the edge.

Death road truckers!

But the views were incredible

Semuc had been recommended to us by lots of people, some saying it was their highlight in Guatemala. I hate having high expectations and being let down and the terrible road conditions had me worried that we were on some kind of wild goose chase.

When we arrived we were not disappointed, the place we stayed at was aptly named Utopia. And a Utopia it was. A beautiful wooden lodge, run by lovely people, set on a hillside overlooking a crystal clear river.

Utopia Lodge

We took a walk to the natural wonder that is Semuc Champey but encountered a bridge that locals enjoy jumping off. Still in lunatic mode, Niles dropped his bag and threw himself off the 40 ft drop. I decided to film and stay dry.

After all that adrenaline we continued to Semuc Champey and climbed the Mirador, a point which overlooks the natural limestone pools. I nearly had a heart attack on the steep climb but the view from the top… spectacular!

Worth the climb 

The rest of the day was spent splashing around, jumping into the pools and enjoying the sunshine. It really is a beautiful place and I would say a must see if you’re in Guatemala.

(NK) The next day we had more exploring to do at Baktun caves. We’d heard warnings about this place and some people had even said it was…. DANGEROUS!

OOOOH, EEEEER, AAAAAH. Let’s Go!

Health and safety in England would dictate that such a tour as this would involve dry suits, elbow and knee pads, helmets, torches, Buoyancy devices etc etc.

We turned up in our swimming gear and were given a candle at the entrance.

As we waded through the cave system there were plenty of points when we had to swim one handed holding our candle in the air as our ‘guide’ shimmied over rocks and up underground waterfalls.

Caving, Guatemalan style

Half way in, our guide looked at our bedraggled group and decided it was time to turn back. We reached daylight with and inch of candle left, although some had burned out. It was a real adventure and the caves had a very peaceful feeling. I’ve always thought of myself as the cave dwelling type.

Back at the river, some divvy had built a massive swing that arched off the bank and over the water. The idea being to slip of the swing at the end of the arch and fall gracefully into the water.

It just needed some divvy to go first. That divvy was me. Full of bravado from my earlier jump off the bridge, this rope swing looked like a piece of piss.

I jumped on without even thinking and as it swooped down and out of the river I suddenly became aware that I’d not really thought this one through. As it reached the end of the arch above the river the guide shouted jump. My bottom half jumped but my arms remained attached to the swing as I clearly had issues about letting go, this left me on a horizontal angle to the river. At 20 ft high, this is a world of shit.

As I hurtled towards the river my mind went blank and I slapped into the water like a pissed off humpback whale.  I surfaced to find a riverbank of concerned onlookers. The queue for the swing quickly dissipated. Luckily for me, Fi didn’t get that one on camera, no doubt you’ve been framed would’ve paid handsomely for such footage.

(FK) So after all of Neil  Kirwan’s escapades and heroics, he caught a bug and ended up in bed hallucinating and thought he was a stand up comic. In between playing nurse nightingale, I decided to do a chocolate tour with Pam and John at Utopia, it was suspiring how much I learnt, here’s a few little facts:

1.     Typical chocolate bars at home contain less than 1% cocoa.

2.     The factory process extracts the cocoa oil which is replaced by vegetable fats in milk chocolate and this oil is used to make white chocolate (to make more money from the crop).

3.     It grows in pods on tree trunks like something out of Avatar and the colour is dependent on what creature has pollinated it.

4.     The husk of the cocoa nib can be used to make tea, which has more antioxidants in it than green tea.

A pod

Fi's Chocolate Factory

The best bit was making the chocolates, after adding a cup of ground sugar to a pound of nibs we heated and blended it three times to make a rich and slightly bitter dark chocolate gooiness. Green and Blacks eat your heart out. Guess what everyone will be getting next Christmas?!

The finished product

With Neil fully recovered and no longer babbling nonsense, we headed to Copan with our new friends, Yanni and Michelle. Yanni is Colombian, so he came to the garage with us and helped us translate a service and oil change for Trisha.

After a fond farewell we jumped back on the highway and motored towards Antigua. Our trip was about to go to the dogs.